Faces of Choice
Stories of Women Who Faced an Impossible Decision Under Extreme Circumstances

Lourdes’ Story

Lourdes’ Story

Lourdes discovered she was pregnant at a migrant worker camp in the Pacific Northwest. An illegal alien and the mother of four children under the age of ten, she didn’t know where to turn.  During the day she and her husband worked in the fields picking strawberries while their children were tutored by someone’s grandmother in a tent packed with other migrant children.  This job would last most of the summer, but they weren’t earning enough money to get ahead and it was difficult to find adequate housing at the migrant camps for a family of six.  The farmers preferred young, strong, single immigrants because they ate less and didn’t balk at close quarters.

As she bent over the toilet one morning, Lourdes was approached by a woman she had gotten to know in the fields.  Maria put her hand softly on Lourdes’ back and asked how far along she was.  This simple kindness reduced Lourdes to tears and she sat on the cement floor, her head in her hands, unable to speak.  She was terrified to tell anyone she was pregnant.  Like the vast majority of Mexican workers here, Lourdes was Catholic.  She and her husband didn’t believe in birth control or abortion, but Lourdes felt her desperation growing with each day.  She couldn’t afford to feed another mouth.  They would be forced to return to Mexico where their life was even more difficult.  She was afraid of crossing the border without her husband, trailing four children behind her. She wasn’t even certain they could find a safe place to live until Pablo reunited with them or sent money.  Over the last few years Lourdes and Pable had begun to hope that they could find stable employment and become legal.  This pregnancy made that scenario seem impossible.

Maria was sympathetic.  She had known other women in this same situation and understood the dangers.  These women were not allowed to even utter the word ‘abortion’ to their husbands.  Nor were they permitted to refuse their partners’ sexual advances.  The majority of the Latino men in the camps believed that pregnancy, childbirth, and child rearing were the responsibility of the women and while they felt the financial strain of another child in the family, they simply expected their wives to adjust in a way that would make the expansion of the family work.

Maria knew of a clinic in a neighboring town that could offer Lourdes some assistance.  She explained that if Lourdes chose to continue the pregnancy, at least they would offer her some prenatal care.  Although she wasn’t sure how she would manage to get away from the camp for a day, Lourdes was willing to go see what she could learn.

The following Saturday, pleading ‘woman troubles,’ Lourdes and Maria boarded a rural bus to the clinic.  As they walked down the sidewalk toward the doctor’s office they heard chanting and saw signs waving in the air.  Protestors lined the street in front of the clinic, shouting and blocking the entrance to the driveway.  Lourdes was terrified.  She felt as though Maria had betrayed her – this was an abortion clinic!  Maria quickly explained that abortions were performed here, but so were other services.  She wrapped her arm around Lourdes’ shaking shoulders and guided her into the side door of the office.  Inside, the only sounds were the bubbling of the fish tank and elevator music.  The doors and windows of the clinic were thick by design to protect against the raucous noise of the protestors who gathered outside on a regular basis.

Lourdes sat down as Maria explained to the receptionist that they were there to see a doctor.  All of the clinic staff spoke Spanish and they were familiar with the migrant worker community.  Many of their services were performed for free or in trade for handmade items or cleaning services.  A medical assistant took Maria and Lourdes back in to an examination room and took a medical history in order to determine how far along Lourdes’ pregnancy was.  A urine test was performed to confirm the pregnancy and Lourdes was given several pamphlets explaining her options in Spanish.

Like many of the women who enter this clinic, Lourdes came  under the pretense of obtaining prenatal care.  It is terribly difficult for someone with a strong religious or moral conviction against abortion to admit that they might be willing to entertain the option of having one.  Maria knew not to make any assumptions about what would ultimately happen.

Lourdes read the handouts over and over again, her head bent toward the the linoleum floor.  The medical assistant left the room to allow Lourdes and Maria to talk privately.  Lourdes cried silently as she admitted to Maria that what she wanted most was to not have to make this choice at all.  She wished for a way to refuse her husband or, better yet, access to invisible birth control.  Maria rubbed her back and murmured her understanding.

The rest of this story will be available in the book when it is released. Like our Facebook page to get updates on the publishing process!

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